« Outside my Front Door...The South of France. | Main | Pajama Party »

20 April 2009


Feed You can follow this conversation by subscribing to the comment feed for this post.


Just the other night, while my Hubbie was out of town, my youngest son, John, came over for a visit. John is my son from another marriage and his father is from Holland, and like the dutch, John has blond hair and is fair skinned. My father looked like an indian, tall and dark and full of mirth. My father died many years ago when I was 13.
Anyway, John was telling me a story of mirth... and he leaned back and laughed and I gasped! For the first time, I realized what a strong resemblance there was. I was watching my dad in the throws of a funny story. Still laughing after all these years.


Heres hoping that the rains stops and your heart continues to heal. There is nothing like family!!!


Corey It's raining here too in Michigan and I'm missing my daddy so much. It has been over ten years since we lost him and today with the rain I'm sort of angry with him for leaving us. I know how unrational this is but I can't help it. So today your post has so much meaning to me.


many hugs to you (((())))

Jeanette M.

Bitter and sweet. If it hadn't been raining you might not have called home and had that lovely experience. By the way, I live in Phoenix and we pray for rain!


I was just thinking that I should email you about dealing with grief and a father passing. My dad was told last Thursday to go home and get his affairs in order and to start getting home care to deal with the end coming. He has pulmonary fibrosis. He is only 68. I am in pain and having a tough time dealing with losing my father. He is a wonderful father and going much too soon for my liking.

Today it is extremely windy outside. It is whipping the trees around and hitting my home. That is how I feel. Violently thrown off where I want to be and angry for what lies ahead. Like your rain I want the wind to go somewhere else for a change. I am tired of feeling this way. Grief is a cruel thing.


Corey, you are so eloquent and your words brought tears to my eyes. My father has been gone for 20 years. Unbelievable. I still miss him. Occasionally he visits in my dreams, which are precious moments.


such a beautiful sharing -

after the intensity of your grief burns off, the memories you have left are pure gold.

Wandering Chopsticks

Whoa. Chelsea is getting her BA at 19! Go her! What a brilliant woman!

Isabel ~ Maison Douce

Beautiful post, Corey....! You have an amazing eloquency and your writings are always beautiful and touching!!


Corey, I lost my Dad 34-years ago when I was 21. I still miss him, and I still wish that he was here... So many times in the past 34-years I've needed his guidance and reassurance... it does get easier, but it never goes away... I was a "Daddy's Girl" and, I guess, once a Daddy's girl... always a Daddy's girl.

Sending hugs and blessings. Dixie


How wonderful to be able to call home and speak to so many joyous, innocent voices of children to help carry you onward.

Mr. Carriage Clocks

Great posting the pictures you posted a very beatiful.


Corey, you have some of the most attractive brothers !!!! Wowza.

Love you madly, my dear.


OH Corey... My heart feels for you and my arms embrace you. I am sending sweet butterfly kisses your way, and looking forward to seeing your smile this summer!


Someone wrote "without grief, there is no love". How true. I was a Daddy's girl, Dad passed away 24 years ago this month. Like your Dad, he had immense love for his family and was the link between us all. When my Mother says "you are just like your Dad", I think this is an immense compliment.


Thinking of you and wishing you all well.
What a beautiful family
Sending many hugs.
Congratulations Chelsea!


In the last few days, we've had almost four feet of spring snow, wet, heavy but needed. We want to complain because it is almost May but we know that without it, the summer will bring drought and wildfires. So....today we continue to shovel, look for leaks in the ceiling or stress cracks from the weight but glad for the storm.

Malia BN

Exactly, Corey, being able to reach out across oceans to family is so wonderful in this day. I sometimes think of the pioneer immigrants who were sometimes never able to see or hear from their family again and am so thankful for today's technology!! But you and your family must get skype - video/audio link for free!!!! Our family chats several times a week (they're in New Zealand and I am in Washington state) and it brings them so close -this past weekend some of our family buried Mum's ashes next to Dad's up on the hill of our family farm - next best thing to being with them. Thank you, Corey, for the reminder to creat joy in everything I do and it will make for a brighter day :)


Hi Corey,

Beautiful post. What are the pink flowers in the top picture? They almost look like azaleas.


Such a beautiful post - and beautiful photos too - your blossom tree shots are so evocative. Thank goodness for Skype to keep families closr by, for those little moments of life. It makes it so much easier to keep in touch with children across the oceans. Hope the rain stops for you and a beautiful rainbow takes its place.

Linda Hanselman

I just said out loud this morning "I wish I could call my mom today." Then I realized she's been gone 7 years yesterday. Missing your parents never leaves you. You just learn to live with the hurt.


Your heart touches me. When I am driving alone I feel my mother is present in the seat next to me and I talk to her. She loved to ride and drive in any car. I place other special family members in the back seat as we drive along. Rain can get me down at times, especially since we get so much here in Oregon. Today the sun is shining, a very good thing.


What a beautiful tribute to your father and to family. I still find myself wanting to talk to my mother or asking my dad for help to get something done. I don't think those impulses will ever go away.


I can really empathize with you about the rain. Remember, I live in England and there are times when we get one week of rain... one day of sunshine, and another week of rain. I want to break all the windows in my house when that happens.

My British husband keeps telling me, "This is lovely weather!" He just makes a cuppa tea and relaxes into it. I light candles to ward off the dreariness.

christine allen

You are an extremely gifted individual. The things you write give us pictures in our mind and food for our souls .. but none of the pictures are like the ones you share with us.

You have helped me understand grief ...

Thank you.


'Bless you all !


I lost my husband last year and have been flooded with dreams, memories, sensations that are both painful and joyous. It's good that you write because you can capture these sacred, fleeting moments.


Quelle belle famille ! Dans ces photos tout est Amour et Joie de vivre !


The worst is when you are in a crowd of group of strangers and the grief hits. I've done this a few times lately and I fell like a goof.Oh well.
I loved your post.

Donna @ An Enchanted Cottage

Reading your post brought back all the feelings of grief that I experienced throughout the first year without my mother, back in 1996. At times I honestly didn't know how I'd make it through another day. I miss her to this day, and always will... And even though it's now 13 years later, I can still be caught with a lump in my throat and tears in my eyes at an unexpected moment. But the grief is no longer raw, and the tears and sadness (for the most part) have been replaced with memories and laughter over the time we did have. Thankfully, the rain subsides with the passing of time... Donna @ An Enchanted Cottage


I'm saying a special prayer for you Corey
and thinking of you dear one!



Ah, bittersweet. This weekend, my sister and I were looking through some old pictures and it was so much fun, until I got to the ones taken shortly before my Daddy died. Could not look at those at all. Usually, it's okay, but not this weekend. I wish he could have called me today. Lately, I miss his call more and more, not less and less. Grief - ever changing.


Thinking of you Corey, and your beautiful family. What a lovely post. Goat and all!


I'm so sorry that it's been an emotional day...and I understand that rain doesn't help!

I'm so glad, though, that you have such a wonderful family, and that you're able to share these thoughts in such magnificent writing.

I hope you have a trip planned for the summer!


Truly beautiful and honest!



I wanted to say something that would be uplifting and inspirational-- but they are mere words on a paper---however well intended that cannot fill the gap between the loss and separation with those who were once bonded with love. Death is inevitable we all suffer losses throughout our brief lifetime, yet one can never truly prepare oneself for the deep down pain in our hearts due to this loss, yes time goes on, the shine will shine, we get older, memories tend to fade, but the connection never does. You must have loved deeply -- in order to feel the loss so deeply,
the dowser daughter


I continue the process of sorting through my dad's belongings...week in and week out. Last week I felt like I was in the process of erasing little bits of his quirkiness / a la dementia when I sorted through a white plastic box that used to hold wipes now filled with eight different types and colors of bottle caps, a 1 oz. portion cup that he'd fill with maple syrup and steal from his favorite breakfast place (fortunately it was empty!!!)...and last but not least 4 beautiful shells. Everything but the shells was relocated to a black garbage bag. These are sacred, private times I spend in his room sorting and crying, laughing and getting angry all at once. Lucky us for having known such deep love.


Dear Corey,
I can honestly say that 26 years after my father's death I can still cry like it was yesterday. I think we spend the rest of our lives grieving the losses of someone special. What a delightful call home..........


14 years ago when my grandmother died, I thought I would never ever stop ALMOST calling her on the phone to tell her something. Now 5 years after my mom died, I still get angry that I can't talk to her about what it was like to be a mother to me when I was 10 like my daughter. I think about her often and though it seems like I've gotten used to her being gone, it amazes me how out of nowhere I can get really pissed off she's not here or burst into tears like it just happened yesterday.


My dad died almost 15 years ago and I still have days like this.... sending love~ xo
& just want to tell you that I think this post is beautiful !


I miss my Pop so very much my heart aches some days. I will keep you in my prayers but know this, he lives on in all those little ones. It seems like some days it hurts worse than others, then I remember all the good times and the laughs we shared. It always hurts but there will come a day when you can remember them with rejoicing too.

Elaine L.

My husband's mother has been gone for 27 years and he woke up yesterday morning and with misty eyes said, "I miss my mother."

My father is in failing health and I have days where his death seems so close that I cry thinking about it. It's so hard to contemplate the death of someone who has been there for me my whole life.

You are so very fortunate to have such a large extended family to share the love and memories.



Corey, thank you. You are in my thoughts and you have been an incredible source of comfort to me since the start of last year. As your father was in the hospital last year, mine went in as well. We were so lucky that he came home to us after 10 days. This year we were not so lucky. Tomorrow will be one month since he passed away.

"Grief is like this, it comes and goes, staying with us until it has dissolved into our being, and made whole."

Thank you.

Julie Ann Evins

Hope the sun comes out very soon Corey x


Corey, I lost my mother in 1983 and my father in 1999. I don't think about them every day and I don't cry every day but there are times...times when I least expect...that sorrow washes over me and the tears begin. It can be something as simple as working in my garden and wishing I could show my latest blossoms with my mother. It could be watching my grandson play football and wishing my dad was sitting on the bleachers with me to watch his name-sake run on the field.

I don't think we ever get over the death of our parents, or of anyone we love...human or animal. The sorrow ebbs and flows in our soul until the day we die.

This time I can honestly say that I know exactly how you feel. I've been there and I've done that. The only comfort I can give to you is that if there wasn't so much love, there wouldn't be so much pain.


Beautiful post Corey...dealing with the loss of my grandson, Nick has been a heavy burden...having family close by helps to lighten the load of grief.


Oh, I'm sorry that you had such a sad blue day, Corey. But then, isn't it amazing that with just one phonecall, you found instant loving sunshine? Your family sounds wonderful.


Sharing experiences transcends generations. Such eternal love should be contagious in our society. Thanks for reminding us_it is lovely!


This is such a touching story, I am happy that you have a wonderful loving family to share life's ups and downs with, he is there with you my friend.


Hi COrey,
I have been following your posts for some time now and I have to say a simple...Thank you to you. You put into words so beautifully how I feel some days. I find so much comfort in your words over the loss of my Mom, my best friend. I share your grief on the days you post about your father. It helps me. You are such a beautiful soul.


Oh Corey I nearly burst into tears when I read that your niece wanted her Vo back alive. I haven't read you blog for a while...smack me...and wondered how your Dad was. I am so sorry to read this.

Did you honey get his pilots licence?....Pete is one essay away from his avionics B2 licence...can fix you husbands aircraft...lol He is off to Switzerland to do the final essay in 3 weeks.


The comments to this entry are closed.

French la Vie Creative Journeys in France. Please join me in 2023 to learn more click here
French La Vie started in 2005. I have the "Brocante Bug," which means antiquing is my cure; France can do me no wrong when it comes to treatment ° 35 years living in France with my French Husband, whom I met while dancing in San Francisco ° Two children, now in their early thirties, amour et joie ° Come join our journey either vicariously through my blog or on a French La Vie Week Retreat in Provence °