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09 December 2013


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Yes, that is the price of loving, of living fully and embracing those people who shimmer and sparkle around you.

Mine is called Robert. He lives upstairs in France


((((((Oh Corey)))) such a beautiful and sad post.

George in Brooklyn

Precious friendship like yours and Annie's is indeed special. What a gift.


I hear what you are saying, Corey. I feel it, too.
"One thing is certain: I am ready for this year to end. It has been heavy. Too eventful. Causing me to reflect far too long in the bathtub."
These could have been my words. I put all my hope into the New Year.

Hug Annie for me, please. And peace to you both, sweet dreams,


I have wiped my nose on the back of my hand reading this-as you know 2012 was a year that was heavy yet lost to me-tending to my dad's health issues and the daily needs-sometimes I feel like I am lost. I am also reflective and tired and ask myself similar questions-my heart is trying to stay in the spirit and season of advent...waiting ..... I can hear my heart beat waiting-


Love your Annie posts even this one filled with sadness. I can relate to what each of you are feeling and will pray for you.


My heart is with my mother who is less tired than Annie but at age 96, has the same weary longing.

My heart is with my little grand girls and all their fun and happy hopefulness.

Hugs to you and Annie.


My heart is here: I quote, YOU~ XO

"One thing is certain: I am ready for this year to end. It has been heavy. Too eventful. Causing me to reflect far too long in the bathtub." hugs

Shelley Noble

Argh, slaying post, Corey. Slaying.

Another part of the journey.

Bev S.

I have certainly had years where I have felt like my heart and my body just seem to limp into the New Year. Sometimes the only thing that keeps me going is faith in God and everlasting hope.

And yet...today is the 1 year anniversary of my son being sober. (He started his sobriety on the 100th birthday of my grandmother, which I only found out later.) I never believed it possible, truly. I believed that he was going to be our cross to bear. We marvel every single day and give the glory all to God for all things are possible (to quote the angel Gabriel).

Nancy in AZ

Oh Corey, My heart is with my mother who passed away 2 weeks ago. She suffered greatly and never complained, but she did wonder why when she was ready, she couldn't just be done with it all.

Jenny M

WR, said it so well! There is a price for caring & loving those that have entered our hearts and found a place to dwell there.

Jenny M

WR, has said it so well! There is a price for caring & loving those that have entered our hearts and found a place to dwell there.

sue j.

dear Corey -- you have been Annie's dear heart for a very long while. how this post has touched me and everyone who has or will read it.


You say "years ago" about your father and I think "it hasn't been that long, has it?" And it has; seems like it is so much fresher than that.

2013 has certainly been a challenging year, but it seems to me like each successive year contains more challenges than the last. And then I remember that He tells us it will be like this. And I wonder, like Annie, what is He waiting for?

Deep thoughts for a Monday...

Wishing you and Chlsea traveling mercies as you wing your way "home"


My heart aches for you and for Annie. Tomorrow is the 17 year aniversary of my sweet Mother's passing and I have been thinking of her all week. Kiss Annie's cheek for me and tell her she is in my thoughts and prayers tonight. God's blessings on you both.

Carolyn Mallin

Dear Corey,such a heartbreaking post. I was getting my home ready for Christmas this year. I love to do this even though it tires me. I just try to take it slow and easy.My grandchildren love all the lights and decorations.
I came across pictures of my mother and father. Some taken before I was born and one with me as a babe fathers arms.And that's where my thoughts were today.My sweet mom has been in heaven for 52 years. And my dad joined her 28 years ago. I miss them both.


And we will all long for Annie when she is gone one day.
How deeply a soul can touch those who have never met her.
She is in essence all of our loved ones we deeply miss. We find comfort in her life somehow because of you sharing her with us. Thank you.

Iowa Julie

Leave it to the Universe, Corey. Trust.


I agree with you about this year - it's been a very tough year emotionally for me also with a few losses of friends and other family issues to heal from. Your friendship with Annie is such a beautiful thing and I thank you for sharing her with us - such a sweet treasure she is, as are you! xxoo


I feel fortunate to know Annie through your post and to enjoy the friendship the two of you share. xo

paula s in new mexico



I, too, am ready for this year to end. Never put 13 & 2013 together, makes so much sense. And, now, Friday the 13th is coming - the day my husband is supposed to leave the hospital.
Love reading about Annie & you, so special.
Have a safe trip home to CA, I will be thinking of you.


Oh my, heavy heart!
Precious Annie longing.
Enjoy your trip, but
then hurry home to Annie.


A beautiful post, Corey. Hello to dear, gentle Annie.


It is better to have loved and lost than to never have loved. It seems love operates within a range of extreme joy to extreme sadness.

Annie saying "I'm ready to go", makes me wonder what I'll be like at 97. I've already talked to God and said I won't go to heaven if I have to do accounting up there. Then I'll look at my beautiful Christmas trees which I love, love, love and think, I wanna take my trees with me. I have spent years collecting the most beautiful ornaments. Then I think, God must laugh at my prayers and thoughts. Enjoy the moment, Corey, and have a wonderful Christmas.


What a blessing you have been to each other! Sending love and light and hugs across the miles and ocean to both of you. Your heart is breaking - hold it tenderly.

La Contessa

I THINK YOU SHOULD CARRY IT IN YOUR WALLET……………she will miss you,but I know French Husband and the SON will be there to step in when you go.

Patti Lloyd

"The soul would have no rainbow, had the eye no tear." I embroidered that on a wall hanging once. With the delicate wistfulness of your post,Corey, I sense that you are not really sad. Sometimes we cry from the beautiful and profound. You have a way of finding this, always. Life's lessons are deep, but I feel you have the grace you need to embrace the sometimes aching realness. Namaste.

Marsha @ Splenderosa

Hold on to her as long as you can, but then realize letting her go to her next more-elevated way of living will release her from pain and not knowing. If we do our jobs (the work of the Lord & the angels)while we are at this level we will ascent up one more level where more information will become available, and all will be peaceful....


The year has indeed been heavy. I hold onto to the hope that today's burdens are tomorrow's answers. That the sadness clears the way for an even greater love. I adore your stories about Annie.


I am where all things meet, sadness,truth,love and fear. I too am getting ready for this year to end. A year of endings and the stirring of beginnings hidden amongst the debris. Like new green shoots pushing their way through the rubble. We never leave those we love and they never truly leave us. We carry them in our hearts and minds and recall them when we are in need of solace even when the memories are too painful to bear.
Love is what we hold in the palm if our hands and love us what we cherish, all else is for nought.


Nothing to add... Only tears...


I recently had a conversation with a 23 year old soul, the daughter of one of my oldest, dearest childhood friends who just lost her much loved grandfather (http://www.basquefarmhouseinfrance.com/2013/09/knight-of-nights.html). She told me her grandafather was now free and no longer "limited" or in pain and that he was now free and able to be carried in heart always without also having to feel his pain...

annie vanderven

may God bless your tender and caring heart. Safe trip and back.

Annie v.




The greatest thing you will ever learn is just to love and be loved in return.

A most touching and beautiful post.

Your stories of Annie deeply touch my heart as in many way she reminds me of my own precious Grandmother...........
The words of your love and friendship have been spoken and your feelings felt many do not get a chance to express what you two have. Much love and prayers and many blessings for Annie and for you while you are in CA for Christmas. God bless you dear one. Merry Christmas. Love Jeanne


Oh Corey how tender the love you share with dear Annie. I hated to hear that FH and son weren't accompanying you to USA. now I know their mission is to care for sweet Annie in your absence. Safe travels and enjoy the arms of your Mother and family awaiting your arrival! Merry Christmas.


Your post is poignant today. My Mother would have been 80 today. She died 15 years ago shortly before her 65th birthday. Love the people in your life. Wrap your arms around them. Give them a kiss and tell them that you love them. It's the one memory you will never regret.


I love your heart. You love so deeply and purely. My heart is with a dear friend who lost her husband a few weeks ago unexpectedly. He was 53. Talk about questions. They were just starting new adventures. You're so right. Sometimes you just sit and listen.

Carol Sasich

I have read your blog for years but rarely comment . I feel like I know Annie through you...and this post makes me so very sad . The thing is , if she is ready to go , she is waiting for you to tell her it is OK , you are ready too and will be OK without her ( barely...)
Her life has been a gift to you , and now you share her with Angels...((((hugs))))


Right now my heart is with you. I hope the love letter is still writing when you return. we know God works all things for good, but sometime i am still afraid. thankfully God's peace passes all understanding. It all sounds cliche i know, but the quotes express not only my weakness, but his strength i lean on. Have a lovely trip, i know you long to be with your Mother and family in California. blessings, jody in fl xxoo


please tell Annie she has fiends like us praying for her peace and comfort. Sure wish i lived nearby to sit with her and hold her hand. xxoo jody in fl


oh dear, of course that was meant to say "Friends"
xoxo jody

Kate Mai

Oh Corey, I know it will be so hard for you to say goodbye to her when you leave, and she will weigh heavily on your heart while you are away. I so hope she waits for you. But if not, you will know that you meant as much to her as she to you.
Safe travels.

Linda P.

It will be hard to leave Annie, but I know your need to be with your mother and your mother's need to be with you has also been on your mind.

Peggy Braswell

I have gotten to know Annie through this blog for that I am forever grateful. xxpeggybraswelldesign.com


Corey you have a way with your words that finds the door to the most sensitive place in my heart...to that place that holds the sadness of friends lost, of friends facing challenges, of just all those I hold tenderly. Thank you for pushing the door open so I could feel deeply this day.
Annie will most definitely be in my prayers while you are with your family in the states for the holiday. Blessings and much peace for you and yours,

sandy austin

What a gift Annie has been for you and you for her. The hardest part of love is letting go. You defiantly need a trip home. You need lots of rest, love and strength that only your mother can give you. Embrace your time together. Remember willows is only a plane ride away.
Merry Christmas! XO


My heart yesterday was welcoming my sweet man home from a long trip. Our home isn't the same without his kind spirit. I am blessed.

Now, today reading this, my heart is with you and Annie. Two women I admire and pray only the best for.

The price of love is far more gratifying than not having loved, holding on to the good memories will always outweigh the sad memories. Warm hugs, Rhonda

Tara Bradford

This has been a year of horrors for many people I know, my family included. And it's not over yet, with terrible news just received today. Am hoping 2014 is a big improvement for us all! Annie is lucky to have you for a friend - and you, her - naturellement! Happy holidays and safe travels. x


2013 has not been a kind year. My son has been unemployed since August. My mother is in the hospital and will most likely never go home again.

jennifer in SF

Sending love to you and to Annie.

Rebecca from the pacific northwest

That was truly tender.


My heart is with my mother and father, who have had better days. My father is out of the hospital from pneumonia and in rehab, thank God! My mother is at home on hospice. I am four and a half hours away, but have been going up after work on the weekend. My heart is so heavy and it is with them and all of the wonderful memories I have as a little girl.Yes, 2013 has not been a kind year. Here's to a better one in 2014. My love to you and Annie. Your words touch my heart in a way that I cannot describe. Thank you for those words and the kind spirit in you, Corey.

Kathie B

OTOH, 13 can be interpreted as lucky (if one is superstitious) -- because after all it's a Baker's Dozen!

Kathie B

P.S. Can Yann and/or Sacha check on Annie during your absence?


Today my heart is with the families who lost loved ones in Sandy Hook, Connecticut, on December 14, 2012 as that anniversary approaches. I think of one couple in particular, as my daughter went to school with them and the little girl they lost will dance forever in my memory as she did on the day I saw her.

My heart is with you and Annie as well. The phrase that child's mother has chosen to use to help her and her family deal with all that has happened is "love wins." It does, and it will. Whatever the love is, it wins.

deb mattin

I have wondered about Annie and this post just makes me sad. Both of you are lucky to have met and cared for and about each other for so long, There is a saying 'when someone we love becomes a memory, that memory becomes a treasure". You have so much to treasure in memories of your dear friend.

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